As hilarious as this story of the police finding porn on Damian Green’s computer is, does anyone really care?
Yes, he has denied downloading these images but even if he is guilty this is not news. I fail to see how an MP whacking off in his office, to legal imagery, nine years ago, is remotely in the national interest. To put this into context, this is the same week that the President of the United States has decided to share far right propaganda and the same week that the border between Northern Ireland and the Republic prove to be a major stumbling block in the Brexit talks. Surely most of us sensible Brits will look at this story with amusement and not the hyperbolic seriousness that the mainstream media has given it.
As titillating as the thought of Green stroking the old boy is, it seems to me that the only wanker here, is the ex-police officer who leaked this to press. Observing the look of glee on this man’s face as he recounted his findings, must surely make one wonder, have the police not got better things to be doing with their time? You know, like catching people committing actual crimes. Given also that no illegal activity has taken place here, the real issue must be the police leaking private data to the public. Jacob Rees-Mogg is absolutely right when he compares this to the behaviour of totalitarian states.
I am sure in the many long years of the palace of Westminster’s existence, parliamentarians have gotten up to all sort of fun and games in their private rooms. Personally, I have never felt the need to get myself off while I am at work, but then I am just a boring data scientist. To those frustrated office workers who find time, I say good on you. In fact, why not make this an actual thing. Call it whack off Wednesday. The perfect midweek pick me up. God knows how much happier as a nation we would be. And it is not just the immediate impact on individual happiness. Think about all those poor office workers who work for sexually frustrated bosses. Let me tell you this is a nightmare experience. If it turns out it was one of Green’s staff who placed these images on his computer, maybe they were trying to tell him something.
(Photo: Wikimedia Commons)